Tips to Help You Start This Important Conversation
If the thought of talking about money or retirement planning with your family makes you uncomfortable, you’re not alone. Many Americans shy away from financial discussions for reasons ranging from a desire to avoid conflict, to preserving privacy, to simply not knowing where to begin. While it’s certainly understandable to want to keep the details of your finances discreet, it’s also important to consider including immediate family members in discussions that could one day impact their lives.
What if your family considers finance and retirement planning topics to be off-limits?
If you grew up in an environment where money wasn’t openly discussed, it might feel natural to avoid those conversations altogether. One survey found that 18% of parents earning over $100,000 per year never planned to share their income or net worth with their children, with 32% stating, “It’s none of their business.”
While how much you choose to share is a personal decision, keeping financial topics entirely off the table may hinder your ability to pass down values, expectations, and planning strategies that could benefit your family.
Sometimes, new lines of communication can start with something as simple as sharing the best financial or retirement advice you’ve ever received over a casual dinner. Tailor your conversations based on the ages and experiences of those involved—young children, teens, adult children, or aging parents—and allow financial literacy to grow through open, honest dialogue.
Financial and Retirement Planning Topics to Discuss
The nature of the discussion will vary depending on the people involved. A senior parent updating their estate plan will likely have a very different conversation with their adult child than a grandparent talking to young grandchildren about saving for the future. Regardless of who you’re speaking with, here are some meaningful conversation starters:
- Money and Values
What financial principles matter most to your family? Conversations about how wealth was built—or the career paths and choices that shaped your financial story—can help dispel assumptions and inspire younger generations. These stories often offer context, showing how budgeting, saving, and retirement planning played key roles in financial growth. - Defining Financial Success
For some, success means growing a family business; for others, it means retiring comfortably and enjoying hobbies near loved ones. Financial goals evolve over time and hearing how different family members define and achieve success can offer perspective and encouragement. - Money Management
Budgeting, saving, understanding insurance needs, retirement planning, and estate planning are all foundational elements of managing money well. While schools may cover some basics, learning from real-life experiences within the family makes these lessons more personal and impactful.
Topics More Specific to Your Family’s Financial and Retirement Plans
Once foundational conversations are established, you can move toward more specific financial topics that reflect your family’s unique circumstances and future goals.
- Financial Planning for Education
If your family is thinking about future education expenses, consider discussing tax-advantaged 529 plans. These accounts can help cover qualified educational costs and even be used as part of a broader retirement strategy, such as rolling unused funds into a Roth IRA under recent legislation. - Family Business Succession Planning
Has your family business been a part of the retirement plan for an older generation? Are there expectations or plans to pass it along? These are important conversations to have early and openly to avoid assumptions and ensure proper planning for all parties involved. - Philanthropy
If charitable giving is part of your family’s values, talk about the causes that matter to you and how future generations might continue this legacy. It’s a great way to share purpose and build continuity across generations. - Caring for Elders
As parents and grandparents age, their care needs may increase. The Federal Reserve’s 2022 Survey of Consumer Finances (SCF), which is the most recent study, found that only 54.4% of Americans have dedicated retirement accounts, and the median balance for those aged 65–74 is $200,000—an amount that may fall short of what’s needed for long-term care. Discussing housing, healthcare preferences, and estate planning can help ensure everyone understands expectations and can support each other when the time comes. - Future Inheritance and Responsibilities
Wealth transfer can be a sensitive topic, but transparency can help minimize confusion or conflict later. Whether assets will be divided evenly or distributed based on specific intentions, an open conversation can help family members understand your reasoning and prepare for their future roles and responsibilities. - Trusted Financial and Retirement Planning Professionals
Sharing the financial advisors, attorneys, or accountants your family trusts can help future generations feel more confident as they navigate their own planning. It’s an easy way to offer guidance and support without needing to share every financial detail.
Talking about money and retirement planning doesn’t have to be uncomfortable or overwhelming. Once the initial barrier is crossed, these conversations can create stronger connections, increase financial literacy, and give family members greater confidence in facing the future. If you would like more information about retirement planning, or ideas on how to speak with your family about money, please contact us.
